No seriously, why? Is there anyone out there who feels like if this song was never released, Morning Musume as we know it now would be incomplete?
Was there a problem UFP had with Brainstorming? Did they say "Mr. Tsunku, your Brainstorming song is adequate but we feel it needs more high notes that half the girls can't hit. Make another song or you're fired!" And so Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai was born. I do not know what to make of this song. I've listened to it several times; I'm even listening to it right now as I'm typing this post but I cannot develop a solid opinion on this song. Sometimes, it sounds good, sometimes it sounds awful and most of the time it sounds straight-up weird. This song is an enigma and not a good one either. I mean, the song isn't... bad. But it doesn't have me falling to the ground singing sweet Hallelujahs like Brainstorming did. As much as I listen to this song, I can't really get into it despite it being yet another electropop song. Momosu's been on an electropop high lately and I think the style works well for them but Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai is... not a good electropop song.
The biggest problem I have with Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai is that it's really messy. It's a wreak of different sounds and unlike Help me!! those different sounds don't blend together very well. The song feels like a bunch of different parts of songs were mashed together because Tsunku didn't know what kind of song he wanted to make. We have the weird-ass opening verses that are Autotuned to hell (which I loathe by the way) and then a perfectly normal chorus that sounds like it came from a pretty normal Momusu song. And then Tsunku's random background vocals strike again repeating "2000 people on the dance floor" (which by the way, there are only eleven girls on the dance floor). Yeah, I think that part's annoying but I'm always annoyed by Tsunku's voice. Each part of the song feels distinct from the other parts, which doesn't really work at all. The song feels choppy and like more of a song demo than a completed song that's going to be released as part of a double A-side.
And then there are the vocals. I found the vocals in Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai to be just as weird and hit-or-miss as the song! Particularly the Autotune. I always say that Autotune can be used for both good and evil. It can be used to enhance a singer's voice for artistic purposes (such as Perfume and Kyarypamyupamyu) and when done well, the tool can work nicely. But here, the Autotune used on the girl's voices is done for more artistic reasons but it isn't done well. The vocals in the opening verses are way too Autotuned and don't flow smoothly with the instrumental, or even the rest of the song. I think the Autotune in Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai is even more gratuitous than the Autotune used in One Two Three! The rest of the vocals are pretty hit-or-miss; Mizuki sounds fine and even Ayumi sounds decent but oh Riho, why do they keep giving you high notes? Her voice sounds like a poor imitation of Reina's in this song. As for Reina the graduation girl herself, she sounds fine and I think the pitch of the song is clearly meant for her. She sounds very comfortable hitting the high notes that no one else in the group can hit properly in this song.
Oddly enough Haruna of all girls gets a brief amount of vocal exposure in this song along with Sayumi. The two of them share little Autotuned "Wow oh~!" lines preceding the chorus that sound okay. I'm just surprised that Haruna got a teensy little vocal push since I didn't think she was that popular. Maybe she's being groomed to take on the role Sayu has in the group once Sayu graduates. She's too Autotuned for me to judge how her voice sounds but she sounds bearable along with Sayu. As for Eripon, Haruka and Zukki, I hope you're not a fan of any of them because you don't get to hear them at all in this song! Don't you just love when that happens? Eh heh... yeah, I'm not surprised. Well, I still can't figure out why Haruka's being constantly shafted but oh well.
So back to my original question: why does this song exist? Brainstorming is a kickass song that I can't find any faults with; why does there need to be another A-side? It'll only pale in comparison to Brainstorming and believe me Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai doesn't have shit on Brainstorming. Was the other A-side necessary? Well... I think UFP wanted a song that was more Reina-centric and focused around her graduating. But honestly, I feel like Reina gets the same amount of exposure in Brainstorming that she does in Kmi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai; she's leading both songs and has an on-again, off-again center spot that she switches back and forth with Riho. Well, there are the bright yellow costumes which could be considered a throwback to Ambitious Yashinteki de Ii Jan, the first Momusu single in which she had a center spot. I don't know if that's necessarily true but if so, that is a nice little shout-out, even if the costumes from the single looked like paper bags painted yellow.
The outfits for Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai look much better but I still prefer Brainstorming's costumes. The problem is... they're yellow. Like super yellow. I like the color yellow in small quantities but in the dance shot released for this song, the girls look like dancing highlighters. I do like the styling of the costumes though; the girls look a lot like flappers! I honestly think that if there had been a dance with more movement, the dresses would have looked really cool in motion. But... the dance in Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai has less movement and more... marching! It looks okay I guess; I'm not really one to judge dances but even I can see that Brainstorming pwns the dance to Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai like everything else revolving around this goddamn song. Overall, I still think Brainstorming kicks ass and is a near-flawless song that I can't wait to review once the actual PV comes out. Once the Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai PV comes out, I'll probably just parrot much of what I said here.
Well, I'm sure that Reina fans will be happy that there's not only one A-side but two A-sides for her last single, along with her own solo track. You know, I feel like this graduation single is paralleling Takahashi Ai's graduation single a lot: the single is a double A-side, the girl graduating gets her own solo song... Just think guys: this is it! This is the last single before we never have to hear Tanaka Reina in a Morning Musume song again! I know I sound like a heartless biatch but... I'm so excited! Even if Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai is a weird-ass song it can't bring down the giddiness I'm developing for Reina's graduation! So to sum this mini-post all up: Brainstorming > Kimi Sae Ireba Nani mo Iranai and I'm happy this single is a double A-side!